Chapter Three

The Cost of Friendship and the Call of Discipleship

There came a point in my life where I had to face a hard truth:

Some people I loved couldn’t go where Jesus was taking me.

Not because they were bad. Not because I didn’t care.
But because Jesus was calling me deeper, and they were content in the shallow.

And if I’m honest, I didn’t want to lose anyone.

I wanted Jesus and the friends who didn’t follow Him.
I wanted truth and approval.
I wanted transformation without separation.

But that’s not how discipleship works.

“Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’”  (1 Corinthians 15:33)

“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.”  (Matthew 16:24)

Following Jesus is a narrow road.
And not everyone will walk it with you.

I had to learn the difference between loving people and walking with them.

Jesus never stopped loving Judas. But He didn’t stop His mission to keep Judas close.

“Can two walk together unless they are agreed?”  (Amos 3:3)

Sometimes agreeing means separating.
Sometimes love says goodbye.

That was one of the hardest parts for me.
To feel like I was abandoning people, when in truth, I was choosing obedience.

And obedience isn’t unkind.
It’s just costly.

I learned to stop chasing those who chose to walk away.
I learned to stop proving myself to people who never asked God about me.
I learned that friendship with the world is enmity with God (James 4:4).
And I had to make a choice.

Would I remain loyal to people who no longer recognized what God was doing in me?
Or would I remain loyal to Jesus, even when it meant walking alone for a season?

“Everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.”  (Matthew 19:29)

I had to lay people down like Isaac on the altar.
Willing to lose them, trusting that God would give back what was meant to remain.

You may feel torn right now.
Between old circles and your new calling.
Between loyalty and obedience.
Between belonging and becoming.

Let me tell you what I had to tell myself:

You are not disloyal for growing.
You are not selfish for obeying God.
You are not cruel for choosing holiness over popularity.

Some will misunderstand you.
Some will slander you.
Some will mourn the version of you that no longer exists.

But if Jesus is calling you forward, you cannot stay to comfort those who refuse to follow.

Let God be your peace.

Let His voice be enough.

And trust that those who are truly aligned with His Spirit will walk beside you in due time.

Lord,

I thank You for the people You’ve placed in my life.
And I release to You the ones You’re removing.

Give me the courage to follow You,
even when it costs connection.
Even when I feel misunderstood.
Even when I have to walk alone for a while.

Teach me how to love others well,
but to follow You first.

Let me not fear the cost of discipleship,
because what You give is always greater than what I lose.

In Jesus’ name,
Amen.